Seatmate from Hell, headed to Thailand

One day I was headed to Thailand, and the obvious means over travel from China is by plane. So, I hop on the plane and the guy next to me was…interesting.

Within minutes of meeting him, I knew he had a Colombian wife who was sexy but crazy, and so they divorced. Found out he had an American wife (I think) who he divorced. Had a Thai fiancée (who died) and is currently engaged again to a Thai, and minutes later confessed he loved Thai women and that there are “so many good ones out there.” That’s kinda gross.

The first thing he said to me was, “going home?” As if seeing a young, white kid on a flight from Hong Kong to Bangkok in any way suggests this kid is going home. I would be surprised to all hell if on a flight to China someone asked if I was going home. Naturally it doesn’t look like I belong. So…no. I’m not going home to Thailand right now.

After, he busted out a tin of chewing tobacco and just started dipping on the plane. For 20 minutes. With no spitter. Meaning he’s swallowing it or has serious saliva control or bought a magical brand of non-Snus, Snus-like, loose-leaf tobacco. Dinner comes along (he ordered gluten-free, vegetarian, just to be healthy I guess) and he just reaches his finger in his mouth, removes the wad of sticky dip and goes to town on his steamed broccoli.

I get a glass of wine with my dinner, and a second after ordering, he asks basically if I plan to get hammered with him. (I don’t.)

After dinner he starts talking to me endlessly as I’m clearly trying to sleep. Says that there’s no such thing as a “first time to Thailand” because you always come back. Putting aside the spirit of what he was trying to say, that makes absolutely no sense, because obviously there is a first time you moron. This ain’t a chicken versus egg conundrum. I’m literally going to Thailand for the first time…right now.

Then he reveals he doesn’t have a job there, and that he “just lives there.” And that foreigners are looked down on there and can’t get jobs. (A worker at my Bangkok hostel was French). So I’m not positive what’s going on. In any case, good luck to that guy, but mainly good riddance. I hope things turn out for the best.



Let me know in the comments if you’ve ever had a terrible seatmate! 

Like what you’re reading on Thailand? Check out some other related articles in: The Thailand Chronicles!

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